1831 replies to this topic

[Thrillhouse]

I thought this might be fun. You guys ask me what I think about stuff and I provide hilarious retorts, so ask me something you dillweeds!

Edited by Thrillhouse, 05 May 2012 - 05:09 PM.

[ParOrBetter]

Who would win heads up in a battle of wits between you and jack pearsall. Also who would win the 18 hole stroke play that would run while the battle of wits takes place.

[Thrillhouse]

ParOrBetter, on 05 May 2012 - 05:28 PM, said:

Who would win heads up in a battle of wits between you and jack pearsall. Also who would win the 18 hole stroke play that would run while the battle of wits takes place.

Im going to go with me in the battle of wits for the simple reason that due to his inability to communicate in anything but the third person he would have to send in another person and text his jokes to that guy, thereby diminishing the effectiveness of the routine.

If we have to do the battle of wits while the 18 hole match takes place then I have to play against the guy he sends in to do his jokes in third person for him, and I bet he sends a ringer, so he wins that. If we can do the battle of wits and the match separately I win because he would constantly be wandering off to go "walk the range" so I would win by default.

[ParOrBetter]

Thrillhouse, on 05 May 2012 - 05:44 PM, said:

ParOrBetter, on 05 May 2012 - 05:28 PM, said:

Who would win heads up in a battle of wits between you and jack pearsall. Also who would win the 18 hole stroke play that would run while the battle of wits takes place.

Im going to go with me in the battle of wits for the simple reason that due to his inability to communicate in anything but the third person he would have to send in another person and text his jokes to that guy, thereby diminishing the effectiveness of the routine.

If we have to do the battle of wits while the 18 hole match takes place then I have to play against the guy he sends in to do his jokes in third person for him, and I bet he sends a ringer, so he wins that. If we can do the battle of wits and the match separately I win because he would constantly be wandering off to go "walk the range" so I would win by default.

Hahaha well played

Edited by ParOrBetter, 05 May 2012 - 05:50 PM.

[TheMackDaddy]

I still picture you as being an actual Simpson for the record.

[Iplaxidentlyshotmyself]

What is your opinion on belly putters?

[teeitlow]

TheMackDaddy, on 05 May 2012 - 07:32 PM, said:

I still picture you as being an actual Simpson for the record.

I agree, every time I try to picture Thrill in my head he always looks like his avatar. It's strange....but then we're talking about Thrillhouse.
-D

[Thrillhouse]

Iplaxidentlyshotmyself, on 05 May 2012 - 07:33 PM, said:

What is your opinion on belly putters?

My opinion on that is that if you give me a regular putter, belly putter, long putter, $972,000 boutique putter made of an unknown to the public alloy from the moon and cryptonite or a 2 x 4 and tell me that we are gonna stay on this putting green until I make an 8 footer you better have packed a lunch and brought something to read, cos its gonna be a while.

I don't care what putter people use because putting is hard with all of them, now if only I could get my hands on that unit Al Czervik got from Albert Einstein (who made a fortune in physics by the way) I would be in business.

[driverwedge]

Alright... What are some steps that you would implement to eliminate slow play?

[Thrillhouse]

driverwedge, on 05 May 2012 - 08:30 PM, said:

Alright... What are some steps that you would implement to eliminate slow play?

You get 8 minutes to play a par 3, 13 minutes to play a par 4, and 18 minutes to play a par 5. Beside every green I plant an escaped mental patient, if you are over the allotted time on one hole you get to choose between him kicking you in the nards as hard as he can or stabbing you with a dirty intravenous needle. If you are over the allotted time more than once he gets to choose. Basically if you are slow you are gonna get stabbed by the needle eventually and when that happens you are sure to drop to the ground in convulsions which means we can move your slow butt off the golf course to go to the hospital thereby speeding up play.

[ParOrBetter]

Opinions on the state of tiger woods game?

[Thrillhouse]

ParOrBetter, on 05 May 2012 - 09:12 PM, said:

Opinions on the state of tiger woods game?

He seems tense. I hear there are these ladies that allow you to "escort" them places for $300 an hour. I think hiring a few of them and sharing some conversation over a steamy plate of jalapeno poppers and a couple of glasses of chilled diet mr pibb at bennigans or whatever you do for your $300 an hour with them would be just the ticket to relax T Dub and get that putter warmed up again.

He gets that putter warmed up again and its all gravy.

Edited by Thrillhouse, 05 May 2012 - 09:17 PM.

[hebron1427]

i'm pretty sure i'm going to like this thread

[TheMackDaddy]

It's gonna be a good thread. I got my popcorn ready.

[thaus7]

What is your swag factor?

[Thrillhouse]

thaus7, on 05 May 2012 - 11:01 PM, said:

What is your swag factor?

right now it's 0.04, which means that I can get away with wearing a white belt, although I would look stupid doing so.

[poizster]

I know you claim to be in Calgary, but be honest... were you in Nova Scotia for a good part of the decade? Screw it I'll just be blunt, which trailer park boy are you?

[Thrillhouse]

poizster, on 05 May 2012 - 11:33 PM, said:

I know you claim to be in Calgary, but be honest... were you in Nova Scotia for a good part of the decade? Screw it I'll just be blunt, which trailer park boy are you?

This has actually been addressed in an earlier post (seriously!)

Im Julian, MTLJeff is Ricky, and isaacbm is bubbles.

And there are two things that you need to know about J to the R-O-C. I spin more rhymes than a lazy susan, and i'm innocent until my guilt is proven. PEACE!

[heggy]

Will the Hamburglar ever be brought to justice?

[shuddleston]

thrillhouse, what would you do if you found another mans wallet in the floorboard of your wifes car?

[Thrillhouse]

heggy, on 06 May 2012 - 09:28 AM, said:

Will the Hamburglar ever be brought to justice?

Im glad you asked because this will allow me to clear up some misconceptions. The original hamburglar is dead, in 1988 he bogarted the wrong mans sliders at a Plymouth Michigan white castle. The hamburglar was shot 9 times and died at the scene. for the past 14 years hamburglar incidents pop up at various locations around the world leading people to believe that he is still alive, but he isnt, hes dead and has been for quite some time.

[Thrillhouse]

shuddleston, on 06 May 2012 - 10:09 AM, said:

thrillhouse, what would you do if you found another mans wallet in the floorboard of your wifes car?

Im not married, but if i was id imagine if i had a wife my wife would be annoying, so id take advantage of the opportunity. Id go to the guys house and leave his wallet on his stoop with a note that said SHES YOUR PROBLEM NOW! next to a flaming bag of dog crap, ring the doorbell and run off. then id go home, change the locks, make a big show out of throwing all her stuff on the lawn, and wait for her to show up so i could let her know i was kicking her out of the house for being a floozy. then id sell the house for 40% of its value and run off to jamaica to open a bar on the beach called Flanigans Cocktails and Dreams where I employ Coughlins law (drink or be gone!).

25 years later id learn that she wasnt cheating on me and that the wallet belonged to a guy who she had given a ride home from work that day because his car broke down. I would also learn that the fire i started with the flaming bag of dog crap had gotten out of hand and destroyed 167 million dollars worth of property and that i had been wanted for arson for quite some time.

[MattTheTaff]

I have a boil on my a** which resembles the former Prime Minister Margret Thatcher. I'm not known for any right wing tendacies but I do secretly get a kick knowing that for 8 hours a day, whille in work, I get to sit on the face of one of the most powerful women that have ever lived.
So, given this information, should I take my 4 wood or 2 iron off the tee on a tight par 4?

[Myherobobhope]

Rainbow suspends, pretty cool way of keeping up your pants?

What's your favorite simpson's episode?

[Thrillhouse]

Myherobobhope, on 06 May 2012 - 01:45 PM, said:

Rainbow suspends, pretty cool way of keeping up your pants?

What's your favorite simpson's episode?

I got all tingly and excited when I saw that you posted, I knew it was going to be good!

My favourite episode is Bart After Dark. Its the episode where there is a burlesque house in springfield that bart winds up working in and hilarity ensues. Here are a few of my favourite quotes from that episode (Belle is the proprietor of the burlesque house):


Kent Brockman: Kent Brockman at the Action News desk. A massive tanker has run aground on the central coastline, spilling millions of gallons of oil on Baby Seal Beach.
Lisa: [gasps] Oh, no!
Homer: It'll be okay, honey. There's lots more oil where that came from.
-------------------------------------------------


Homer: Aw, I don't know how to punish you. What does Marge usually do?
Bart: She makes me taste beer.
-----------------------------------------------------------


[When Grampa visits the Maison Derrière]
Grampa: [whistles & hangs his hat; sees Bart] Oop. [whistles again, turns around, picks up his hat and leaves; sticking his head in] Is your name "Bart"?
Bart: [nodding] Mm-hmm.
Grampa: What the... Does your father know you're working here?
Bart: It was his idea.
Grampa: In that case, I'll have a whiskey sour.

--------------------------------------------------------


[Principal Skinner visits the Maison Derrière]
Principal Skinner: Oh, I hope I didn't miss the floor show.
Bart: Nope.
Principal Skinner: Is Roxanne back?
Bart: Yep.
Principal Skinner: Did she, uh, get my flowers?
Bart: She did.
Principal Skinner: [notices Bart] Hello, Bart.
Bart: Hello, Principal Skinner.
Principal Skinner: This is the National Air and Space Museum, isn't it?
----------------------------------------------------------


[When Homer answers the door]
Homer: Awww. This isn't about religion, is it?
Reverend Lovejoy: Everything is about religion, Homer. Except this. Your son has been working in a burlesque house.
Helen Lovejoy: Principal Skinner saw him with his own eyes.
(Principal Skinner appears from behind Reverend Lovejoy.)
Principal Skinner: That's true, but I was only in there to get directions on how to get away from there.
----------------------------------------------------------


Homer: If Homer Simpson wants his 10-year old son to work in a burlesque house, then Homer Simpson's ten year old son is going to work in a burlesque house. (Marge appears and Homer screams) Uhhhh, hi Marge, listen, you're going to hear a lot of crazy talk about Bart working in a burlesque house.

[Thrillhouse]

MattTheTaff, on 06 May 2012 - 01:42 PM, said:

I have a boil on my a** which resembles the former Prime Minister Margret Thatcher. I'm not known for any right wing tendacies but I do secretly get a kick knowing that for 8 hours a day, whille in work, I get to sit on the face of one of the most powerful women that have ever lived.
So, given this information, should I take my 4 wood or 2 iron off the tee on a tight par 4?

Thats interesting, I once tried to sell a potato chip on ebay that looked like a silhouette of Brian Mulroney. There weren't any bids.

To your poignant golf related question (don't know how one of these got in this thread but ill answer it anyway) the correct answer is neither. As you know from the other thread it is physically impossible for anyone to hit a 2 iron anymore and the only people who carry them are complete poseurs who only use them for light yardwork and to chip out from under trees. The problem with the 4 wood is that this is wrx, we hit it 280 with the old 3 woods and since our collective switch to rocketballz woods the 3 woods go too far unless you are using one to replace your driver. We are all hitting 4 woods 297 these days (280+17) so its too much bat. The correct answer to your question is a 19 degree hybrid, the 2 iron is unhittable and the 4 wood goes too far, but like the appropriate bowl of porridge the 19 degree hybrid is juuuuuuuust right.

[MattTheTaff]

Thrillhouse, on 06 May 2012 - 02:50 PM, said:

MattTheTaff, on 06 May 2012 - 01:42 PM, said:

I have a boil on my a** which resembles the former Prime Minister Margret Thatcher. I'm not known for any right wing tendacies but I do secretly get a kick knowing that for 8 hours a day, whille in work, I get to sit on the face of one of the most powerful women that have ever lived.
So, given this information, should I take my 4 wood or 2 iron off the tee on a tight par 4?

Thats interesting, I once tried to sell a potato chip on ebay that looked like a silhouette of Brian Mulroney. There weren't any bids.

To your poignant golf related question (don't know how one of these got in this thread but ill answer it anyway) the correct answer is neither. As you know from the other thread it is physically impossible for anyone to hit a 2 iron anymore and the only people who carry them are complete poseurs who only use them for light yardwork and to chip out from under trees. The problem with the 4 wood is that this is wrx, we hit it 280 with the old 3 woods and since our collective switch to rocketballz woods the 3 woods go too far unless you are using one to replace your driver. We are all hitting 4 woods 297 these days (280+17) so its too much bat. The correct answer to your question is a 19 degree hybrid, the 2 iron is unhittable and the 4 wood goes too far, but like the appropriate bowl of porridge the 19 degree hybrid is juuuuuuuust right.

Ha. 3 iron it is then!

[heggy]

Will Dubb Rubb ever have a flourishing rap career, or is he just a one trick pony?

Edited by heggy, 06 May 2012 - 03:01 PM.

[MtlJeff]

the 3 best Simpsons episodes IMO are:

3) The halloween special where they go to Ape Island (if only for my alltime favorite simpsons quote:
-I hear we're going to ape island?
-yeah to capture a giant ape
-I sure wish we were going to Candy apple island
-Candy apple island? What do they have there?
-Apes....but they're not so big

2) 22 short stories about springfield (the dialogue between Skinner and Chalmers about steamed hams is still absolutely brilliant)

1) The Globex corp Hank Scorpio episode. I just love Scorpio and model myself as a boss after him.

[Thrillhouse]

heggy, on 06 May 2012 - 03:01 PM, said:

Will Dubb Rubb ever have a flourishing rap career, or is he just a one trick pony?

Well I have never heard of him, and I am all up in the rap game. So up until this point he is a zero trick pony who is going to wind up jumping into a washtub from 30 feet in the air at various state fairs.