437 replies to this topic

[Shwagin1066]

CassinoNorth, on 09 March 2011 - 06:55 PM, said:

moonshine, on 09 March 2011 - 03:04 PM, said:

CassinoNorth, on 08 March 2011 - 09:33 PM, said:

Search Function - what you should use before starting a topic

Says you?  Is your "mod" designation invisible today?  Are you going to tell on me if I post in this topic.....gheesh?!  Totally uncalled for, IMO.

lol okay lets just make this exact topic 20x. Makes the forums really pop when there's probably 50 of these already posted since it was created.

No big deal. Ignore forum etiquette.

Ya you're showing great etiquette here. It's people like you that make this forum less enjoyable. What if he wanted some new phrases? What if he didn't want to resurrect a 3 year old thread? Jeez, go get yourself an ice cream cone you deserve it.

[Greenie]

Guia, on 08 March 2011 - 10:25 PM, said:

The one I hear most often "You Suck".

LOL..The one I hear most often after most shots "You Suck Again"

Ever play with that person that hits a drive in the deep rough and can't find their ball and somehow they will end up looking for their ball another 30 to 50 yds farther down the hole then they would usually end up, thinking that since the ball is lost it must have been their longest drive ever. We call that "Fantasyland". He is looking for his ball down in Fantasyland...

[byronn5]

One from last Saturday's round was something like "You could decorate a birthday party with that shot as much as it ballooned."

[dlygrisse]

gators78, on 09 March 2011 - 09:59 PM, said:

I hate "there's a little chicken left on that bone," but absolutely love the variation which is "there's a little bit of sh*t left in that diaper."

I got a buddy who says "there's a little pizza left in that box"

[muzz]

swanry30, on 09 March 2011 - 03:35 PM, said:

I play with a member here that will inevitably pull out this phrase as his putt lips out - "had it in her mouth until her dad walked in."

It has been five plus years and I laugh everytime!  Smiling now as I'm typing it

LMAO

[muzz]

"WTF was that"?
"Does your wife play"
"Your a fat B**ch"!
"Why are you mad.....your not....your not good"
"Get real, you couldn't hit it that far if you had a cannon in your bag"
"Your still away"
"Holy sht ...look at that banana"!

"Your f*5667ing pathetic pal"! (for slow play)

Another "Thurman Munson" reference (Red Sox Fan heheheh), along with the Sally/Alice references......

[JB lefty]

Next time your playing partner leaves a putt short, after he goes up and taps it in tell him to look behind himself and pick up his lipstick.

A Cathy Freeman - A fast runner

[DH48]

In the midst of a blowup hole "I need a tourniquet"

Tha one great shot a round "even a blind hog finds an acorn now and then."

Edited by MrParr1Noid, 09 April 2011 - 12:18 PM.
We don't need that here.

[GatorNate11]

Another one I remember was a buddy sh**ked one, and yelled fore, none of us planned it, I yelled 5, another buddy yelled 6, and then the last buddy yelled 7. The people got out of the way of the ball then everyone around the tee started cracking up

[nikemike]

Funniest thing I've ever heard on the golf course was when a buddy stuffed a shot in close on a short par 3.  The ball spun back just missing the hole.  He turns and says "that had my a** so tight I could have shat in a texas pete bottle".

[jjarrett79]

JB lefty, on 16 March 2011 - 04:16 AM, said:

Next time your playing partner leaves a putt short, after he goes up and taps it in tell him to look behind himself and pick up his lipstick.

A Cathy Freeman - A fast runner

When a guy  leaves a putt short I like to ask them what color panties they have on.

[Ty_Webb]

Couple of others I don't think I've seen on here yet

After someone skies one, "the elephant's rear" - it's high and it stinks
After a big slice out to the right,
After someone leaves a putt short, either "your arms looked like they got caught up in your skirt there" or "you might wanna loosen your bra strap a little there, looks like it's restricting your motion" to go with the dropped your lipstick classic that someone already mentioned

And one of the funniest things I ever saw on a golf course was at the British Universities individual championships. It works like the US Am, in that you have two rounds of strokeplay and the top 64 go into matchplay. On this occasion there were 10 people tied for 61st place, so we had ten people playing off for four spots. There were also around 100 odd drunk students (tad less serious than the US Am) following them, so the pressure was on. First hole is a par five and they're playing a ten ball. One guy is on the green about 40 feet away for three. He hits his putt and it stops about 15 feet short. Horrific putt and he must have been dying inside. As it stops a shout comes from the crowd in a deep Scottish accent "Does your husband play too?" It was a good couple of minutes before things settled down enough for them to carry on. I had never heard that before and was in stitches.

Edited by MrParr1Noid, 09 April 2011 - 12:19 PM.

[Man In The Miura]

I'll ask my playing partner, "Is my bag in your line?" when I'm 5 yards to the side of his tee/fairway shot.

Similarly, "Should I move the pin?" when it's laying 20 feet from the hole.

A friend bawled out once after hitting a superbly ugly shot that ran to the middle of the green, "She wasn't pretty, but she had big ones"

Edited by MrParr1Noid, 09 April 2011 - 12:20 PM.

[Carolina Golfer 2]

After I roll in a 20 footer for triple or worse.

"That's like putting whip cream on poop"

All my regular partners are probably tired of hearing it, but if there is someone new in the group they usually laugh pretty good and say they are going to steal it.

Another one stolen from a buddy of mine.

When someone makes a great short sided chip or pitch off a tough lie.

"that had the touch of a gay hay dresser" Then he will quicky add...."OH MY GOD!!! You're not gay are you?"   if he doesn't know the guy well.  

[bsb70x7]

By far my two most favorites heard in person:

Me and my partner were paired with two guys in a fourball tournament.  One of them hits a 20 foot putt that will roll past the hole at least 20 feet.  About the time the ball got near the hole, his partner yelled "Eject, Eject, Eject."

Playing with my partner one day.  Needed to switch up the order so I pointed to the tee box and say, "age before beauty."  He responds, "if you ain't the lead dog, the view never changes."

[cubiclegolfer]

Dagger!

[jswaykos]

We usually resort to "Classic (insert last name here)" after anything bad happens.  For me, it's hitting an iron dead straight at the pin, everyone watching to see where it lands... only for the ball to fall 15 yards short of the green.  For my buddy, it's trying to hit out of trouble, only to hit into more trouble.  Good times.

[Slapshot45]

while playing in an outing a year ago my foursome was paired up with another foursome which did end up being the longest round of my life but anyways we were on about a 500 yd par 5 and the one guy in the opposite foursome tees one up and hitts and and yells "Thats Home" haha needless to say we get up to the farthest ball which he is claiming is his and it ends up being from my foursome with my partners initials on it hahah what an idiot.... he was a little embarrased.....for the rest of the round me and my team kept yelling thats home after every shot

[ladahl]

Offically stealing it...

swanry30, on 09 March 2011 - 03:35 PM, said:

I play with a member here that will inevitably pull out this phrase as his putt lips out - "had it in her mouth until her dad walked in."

It has been five plus years and I laugh everytime!  Smiling now as I'm typing it

[Sawgrass]

Excuse after a whiff, shank or chunk:  "Tough course!"

[Carolina Golfer 2]

Sawgrass, on 16 March 2011 - 10:14 PM, said:

Excuse after a whiff, shank or chunk:  "Tough course!"

LMAO!!! I like that one.

[ping rat]

A good lie in the rough.... "it's sitting up like a honeymoon "

Edited by MrParr1Noid, 09 April 2011 - 12:21 PM.
.

[wcm115]

My rounds usually consist of variations of different phrases from Tin Cup:

"my god my swing feels like an unfolding lawn chair"

'Have you ever parred the back 9 with a 7 iron?"
"Why Roy, it never occured to me to try."

"I can make this shot"
"Well quit messing around and do it already"

"Nice par Dave"

"Im not going left of the tree or right of the tree.... Im going over the tree..... with a little draw."

Edited by MrParr1Noid, 09 April 2011 - 12:22 PM.
Profanity deleted.

[jswaykos]

Sawgrass, on 16 March 2011 - 10:14 PM, said:

Excuse after a whiff, shank or chunk:  "Tough course!"

I am definitely stealing this!

[RedSide]

"That dog'll hunt!"

[Borthwick]

Upon realizing that the tee shot is going hard left and deep into the woods, "Oh baby, be as good as you look!"

[WHiT3-TiG3R]

LET THE BIG DOGG EAT! haha thank god I've never heard this one in person..

[birdieblair]

If everyone in the group hits the fairway or is on the green in regulation I will often say "to the casual observer it looks like we know what we are doing"  and we have a slew of others.  I am stealing the "Tough Course" one though.

[PatScan]

A Feherty-ism that is just absolutely perfect:

"That swing looked like an octopus falling out of a tree."

[BPSCHMID]

Tee shot that stays JUST in bounds is a Molly Hatchet...you know, "Flirtin'  With Disaster."