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please help me not quit golf


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#1 golf playa

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Posted 29 May 2010 - 08:51 PM

im 15 and i want to play collegiate golf. my coach and i believe that i have the potential, but its all about achieving it. last year around fall i shot 86 and 89 at a tournament. four months ago i shot 80 and 90 but im not upset since it was FREEZING. winning score was 74 and 84, which is pretty high for these junior tournaments. a month ago i shot 80 and 79 at a tournament. i even knew i could've shot lower. but this year on the school team i keep shooting around 43 for 9 holes. it was frustrating. at counties i shot 89, it was terrible.

i guess im saying that i hate golf. i spend so much time on the range, waste so many hours, the last few days i didn't practice felt great, despite my sickness. im finding it hard to push myself to play again. each day feels so much longer without practice. but in way i can't leave the game. i still love it and have already put so much time and money into it.

can some one help me not quit. maybe something inspiration or find out what im doing wrong? i feel that i might be practicing on the range too much and not going out there. i could also be taking it too seriously (in terms of practice) even when i am on the course. i'd always sneek onto an executive course and just hit two or three balls for each hole.

please help me, i really don't want to quit.


#2 Cut Off 6-iron

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Posted 29 May 2010 - 08:56 PM

Take a break, about a week. You'll start to want to go out, but restrain yourself. Sooner or later, you'll be dying to go out to play golf.

#3 golf playa

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Posted 29 May 2010 - 09:00 PM

i really really hope so

Edited by golf playa, 29 May 2010 - 09:01 PM.


#4 crothe

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Posted 29 May 2010 - 09:04 PM

When I feel like that I try to take a couple weeks off. By the end of that, the game is sucking me back in and my head is in a better place. I would also suggest a couple of books if you haven't read them yet. First, "Zen Golf" and second, Rotella's "Golf is Not A Game of Perfect." It sounds like you're a pretty good player, especially for your age. Figure out how to have fun playing golf. If you can't then you have to decide whether your addiction is strong enough or its time to take up fishing. Find some guys who are just fun to play with. I play a lot of golf with guys who couldn't break 100 on their best day but love every second of being on the course. They joke around, rag on eachother, and genuinely love the game. I find I play well and enjoy the game a lot when playing with them.

One last thing. Golf is a game you can play just about until you die. And even better, you'll never beat golf. It will always be there to challenge you. Its a great game and I definitely hope you stick with it.

#5 jorfely305

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Posted 29 May 2010 - 09:21 PM

Yea most definitely take a break. I am on a break right now actually after breaking my PW right below the grip. It was time to take a little vacation after that. Yes I have a bad temper but I baby my clubs and I knew it was time to do this. You will benefit from it. Don't go hitting balls at the range or anything just chill out and do something else. Hopefully it works!


#6 jorfely305

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Posted 29 May 2010 - 09:25 PM

hey crothe thats great advice btw. Playing with people you have fun with is the key. When I play with my friends I could shoot 350 and probably laugh it off when someone shanks one and gets pissed!

#7 mikpga

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Posted 29 May 2010 - 09:26 PM

Why do you play golf?
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#8 Jameson465

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Posted 29 May 2010 - 09:29 PM

i am so glad that golf was during football season in high school so i didnt get burned out like i did in the other 3 sports i played
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#9 DFinch

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Posted 29 May 2010 - 09:31 PM

If you've pushed yourself to the point that the fun isn't there, then you've pushed too hard. You won't get better when you've reached the point that each "bad" shot bothers you enough that they just start to build on each other until your mood is destroyed.

Take a break, give yourself a break, ease up on the "score" pressure you put on yourself, and try to remember how to enjoy it. There are a ton of kids out there your age who don't even have the opportunity to play...ever.

"I cried because I had no shoes until I saw a man who had no feet"

You are incredibly fortunate to be able to enjoy this game at your age, so enjoy it and chill.

It's great to be competitive and want to improve, but your happiness should not depend on it.
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#10 thenewbie

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Posted 29 May 2010 - 09:44 PM

Good luck with that whole quiting thing.  I tried a couple months ago.  I played a horrible round, then on the last hole my bag fell off the cart and my driver shaft snapped.  I really meant that I was quitting too.

2 weeks later I was getting fit for a new driver shaft.

But those 2 weeks were huge for me.  I pushed everything golf out of my life, and even put my copies of golf magazines in the closet.  I didn't even watch golf on TV, and I usually watch golf every single day.  In the end, my whole perspective on golf changed.  I decided I was going to just enjoy myself, and try to enjoy playing again.

Trust me, you have to enjoy what you do.  No matter how good you are at something, or whether it will get you to college or not, life is to short to spend it doing something you don't like doing.  So take a break, but don't do it just to force yourself to come back.  Do it so you can see if you really want to play golf or not.


#11 golf playa

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Posted 29 May 2010 - 11:35 PM

Thanks guys. I am taking a break now, but what really worries me is the fact that I have terrible muscle
memory. Our #1 guy on the team is only one or two strokes better than me when Im averaging terrible. He didn't play from sept. To April and just picked up a club and swung like he did before. One of the reasons I practice every day is becuase I'm afraid that I loose the swing I've worked so hard on. It's happened already this year and I don't think going through it again will make me want to come back.  So there's my dilema.
It's wiered this year, I've had terrible Weeks or months before but I always wanted to head right back. In September I wanted to quit too. My swing went back to it's really old one where it's so flat. I got over it but I held me back pretty bad. What's weird this time is that I'm not playing bad. Yea I did bad at counties but that's because I was in a swing change. I don't know the reason this time. I'm terrified that I might actually want to quit.
I also think that a reason could be my mom loosing faith in me. After counties my older sister by 11 yrs who feel she has parental power said" so he can't get into college with golf. Right?". And mom just casually said "probably not". I don't play for her, but it's hard asking her to sign me up for tournaments and take me to the range when I feel like she believes I'm just wasting her time.  

Sorry for always writing too much. There's just a lot on my mind and no one to talk to who can relate other. Thank goodness for the golfers in golfwrx.

#12 dan360

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Posted 30 May 2010 - 01:31 AM

View Postgolf playa, on 29 May 2010 - 11:35 PM, said:

I also think that a reason could be my mom loosing faith in me. After counties my older sister by 11 yrs who feel she has parental power said" so he can't get into college with golf. Right?". And mom just casually said "probably not". I don't play for her, but it's hard asking her to sign me up for tournaments and take me to the range when I feel like she believes I'm just wasting her time.  

This paragraph bothers me somewhat.
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#13 bsugolf09

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Posted 30 May 2010 - 02:00 AM

+100 on the break.  i played 4 years of NCAA D-II golf.  quit last summer after two months of horrible play and sold my clubs.  i was just sick of grinding and shooting terrible scores, same as you right now.  it took me until the beginning of march this year to get interested in the game again.  the day the course opened, i was out there with the sticks i bought of the BST forum.  now i'm practicing regularly and playing competitively again.  i love it.  you still love it, too.

#14 Jameson465

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Posted 30 May 2010 - 07:20 AM

taking a break is crutial. you arent gonna lose any of your ability by taking a break. if anything it will give your body and mind a well deserved break. and look i know this is easier said then done but you gotta play for yourself and nobody else... if you start building pressure to do better for some other person or to make somthing happen your gonna drive yourself crazy. When i was your age i was very serious about baseball i was seriously looking at colleges for baseball and not thinking about my future ( or deciding what was best for me there was no way i could have been a pro player but it could have paid for college) by the time i was in my senior year i was burned out and HATED baseball i didnt want to see a ball much less play... i never played again after that and i dont regret it one bit... and i dont play the what might have been game either i now enjoy golf 3-4 days a week to keep the competitive juices and i use golf to relive me of day to day stresses it is my therapy.... i hope you find a way to play that is right for you and helps you enjoy it... BTW i have a good family frind that is alot younger than me and he was #2 guy on a state championship team in high school guy was scratch+++++ i just talked to his sister the other day and she told me that he just picked a club up for the first time in 2+ years very sad but he was MISERABLE on the course he took a 2 year break went to school and now is hopefully enjoy the game hs is so good at...... i hope you can find a way to make it fun
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#15 thenewbie

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Posted 30 May 2010 - 07:21 AM

Loosing your swing doesn't mean you have horrible or even bad muscle memory.  There's no one on this board who hasn't had it one day then lost it the next.  The golf swing is a complex beast, and all it takes is one thing, a slight angle change here, a slight tempo change there, and it's gone.

As for your mom, and parents in general, it can be easy to be disapointed when you feel like they aren't on the same page as you.  When I was in high school the only thing I wanted to do was start a band.  When my last season of football was over, it was time.  I started a band, and we were horrible.  We had no clue what we were doing, but we had a blast.  5 years later, after many member and name changes, we were signed to a label and touring the country, and we got really good at what we did.  If our guitarist hadn't lost his belief in what we were doing, I might be in a tour bus now, like some of my friends are.

I guess I have a couple points;  Firstly, we did it on our own.  There's NOTHING like pulling into Chicago, or Buffulo, or Jersey City, seeing all these cities across the country, and knowing that your there because YOU got yourself there.  My parents were supportive after we started getting better, but parents of other members thought it was the biggest waste of time in the world.  True, Nothing came of it but memories and debt, but we HAD to try.  Not trying because the odds are against you is NO way to live.

Second, we always did it because we had passion for it.  Sometimes it wasn't fun.  It's NEVER fun sleeping in a van with 5 guys in a Walmart parking lot, and practice could be grueling, drilling the songs over and over.  (I'll admit, I never woke up and forgot how to play a guitar, which seems to happen plenty with golf.  :russian_roulette: )  But the passion was always there.  After that band broke up, I wasn't ready to give up that passion yet.  I moved to another state to join another band, but nothing came of that either.  Once I moved back home, the passion was gone.  I still play, but Music isn't what it once was to me, so I stopped playing in original bands.

There's my story.  Take it as you will.


#16 moonshine

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Posted 30 May 2010 - 07:41 AM

I think the books post is fair advice, not sure a 15 year old needs Rotella.  Just remember, it is not easy on your body to play and practice all the time.  Maybe when taking a break, you only chip and putt for a week.  Hit a few putts, don't hit balls, and go play nine holes.  Also, hit different clubs off the tee and vary what tees you play.  Hit two balls and always play the worst of the two.  I did quite a few things at 15...every try fishing to relax!?

Good luck!

#17 clearwater

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Posted 31 May 2010 - 06:07 PM

Take a break if you like, but your swing isn't going to magically perform better (for an extended time) when you come back. Put a few swings up and maybe someone can help you play the way you'd like to. Posted Image Posted Image Posted Image

There is nothing wrong with taking a break from anything, but if you want to play better golf then what you really need to do is play better golf. What you describe as poor muscle memory is more than likely NOT having a CLEAR image of what you should be doing on every swing. HITTING A TRILLION BALLS A DAY IS A SERIOUS WASTE OF TIME, if you are not trying to do something better or different.

Edited by clearwater, 31 May 2010 - 06:08 PM.


#18 snkstaff

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Posted 31 May 2010 - 07:46 PM

If you relly want to improve spend more time chipping and putting and less time hitting balls. The fastest way to improve your score is to improve on 50 yards and in. Find a way to get it up and in all the time and college's will be beating down your door

#19 gvogel

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Posted 03 June 2010 - 05:18 PM

View Postgolf playa, on 29 May 2010 - 08:51 PM, said:

im 15 and i want to play collegiate golf. my coach and i believe that i have the potential, but its all about achieving it. last year around fall i shot 86 and 89 at a tournament. four months ago i shot 80 and 90 but im not upset since it was FREEZING. winning score was 74 and 84, which is pretty high for these junior tournaments. a month ago i shot 80 and 79 at a tournament. i even knew i could've shot lower. but this year on the school team i keep shooting around 43 for 9 holes. it was frustrating. at counties i shot 89, it was terrible.

i guess im saying that i hate golf. i spend so much time on the range, waste so many hours, the last few days i didn't practice felt great, despite my sickness. im finding it hard to push myself to play again. each day feels so much longer without practice. but in way i can't leave the game. i still love it and have already put so much time and money into it.

can some one help me not quit. maybe something inspiration or find out what im doing wrong? i feel that i might be practicing on the range too much and not going out there. i could also be taking it too seriously (in terms of practice) even when i am on the course. i'd always sneek onto an executive course and just hit two or three balls for each hole.

please help me, i really don't want to quit.
When you figure out how your hips work properly in the golf swing, you'll never quit. You'll just enjoy hitting balls, and playing the game will become an exercise in "how well did I execute what I can do in practice." You'll take it from the range to the course; not completely successfully, but good enough to enjoy it.

If you don't enjoy that, there is always tennis - and you will stay in better shape.

Me, I enjoy golf (after giving it up about 1000 times).
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#20 rankoutsider

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Posted 11 June 2010 - 08:56 AM

Don't even think about quitting. What you need to do is get a better handle on your expectations. People come to hate this game at times because their expectations are way out of whack with their actual abilities. If you are a low handicap who thinks they are a scratch but who feels they should be a plus, you will want to quit. If you are that same person and is very happy they are a single digit, you will want to get better.

Don't let your expectations get out ahead of your ability. Just slowly improve and you will enjoy yourself.

As for losing the swing and getting it back, that happens all the time to every decent player. Ride it out, hit balls, think about what feels good and what isn't working, and then jerry-rig together some kind of score until your best form returns.

Your problem isn't with your swing, but with what is going on upstairs.


#21 ej002

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Posted 18 June 2010 - 10:45 AM

View Postdan360, on 30 May 2010 - 01:31 AM, said:

View Postgolf playa, on 29 May 2010 - 11:35 PM, said:

I also think that a reason could be my mom loosing faith in me. After counties my older sister by 11 yrs who feel she has parental power said" so he can't get into college with golf. Right?". And mom just casually said "probably not". I don't play for her, but it's hard asking her to sign me up for tournaments and take me to the range when I feel like she believes I'm just wasting her time.  

This is you motivation right there.  You know  you can do it, go out and do it.

I will say one thing, it is easy to burn out on this game.  Especially when you are playing poorly.  When collge rolls around, there will be times when you are in a funk and got to keep playing.  So basically you need to figure out where to go to get yourself back on track.  Rank is right, you issues are in your head.  You need to mentally go somewhere where you can take a mental time out and regroup, then start fresh.   A few days off will not hurt.  You wont forget how to hit a golf ball.


Good luck and just take some pressure off yourself.
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#22 Chappie

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Posted 24 June 2010 - 11:46 PM

Honestly, I got to this point when I just couldn't get over not being able to get what I wanted out of my swing. It sucks to put in hours upon hours a day, only to go out and play like crap.

For me, it was just opening up my mind to everything, not trying to focus on one thing, and finding my swing. I realize that may not be your situation, but I stopped trying to force it, I guess I'm saying, and just accept that it has to come only through patience and an open mind. Right now, it's there. It's not perfect, tweaking needs to be done, more variety in my shots needs to happen, but I'm really happy with my game, whether I put up a 79 or an 89. It's putting and driving that are my two keys to work on right now, and it's something that I've accepted, because my swing is consistent, repeatable, and at a distance that allows me to compete with anyone else.

Whatever is bothering you the most right now, you need to just accept it for what it is. Don't try to fight it, don't let it frustrate you, just work at it. Everything is fixable, tweakable and improvable in golf, so long as you keep your mind open and allow it the opportunity to happen.

Edited by Chappie, 24 June 2010 - 11:49 PM.

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#23 Tanner25

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Posted 25 June 2010 - 07:24 AM

If you are serious about the quitting part (most just say this out of
fustration and have no intentions of quitting), maybe revaluate playing competitively? If you went from practicing and playing 6 days
a week, to a weekend round with your buddies you might enjoy it
better.

You are already in a rare group of kids. Be proud of yourself and enjoy.

Good Luck with your decisions!

#24 gvogel

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Posted 30 June 2010 - 05:17 PM

All of us who have posted on this thread are curious as to what has become of your golf game.

How are you doing?

I posted about learning about the hip move - that's fairly technical stuff.

Instead, I recommend this course of action.

Go out to a practice facility.  Chip with your 9-iron.  Pitch with your 9-iron.  Hit half shots with your 9-iron.  Then, and only then, hit full shots with your 9-iron.

Did you enjoy the experience?  If you like hitting golf balls like that, you should stick it out.

If you don't enjoy the pure act of hitting a bunch of different shots, and want to learn a skill that will serve you throughout your life, I would recommend tennis or squash.  Both are great sports.

Me, I like hitting different shots at a golf practice facility.
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#25 mylo

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Posted 14 July 2010 - 07:24 PM

I played division 1 college baseball at a big school on a full scholarship which was incredibly hard to achieve. In my third year I ended up hurting my shoulder.That was the toughest thing I have ever experienced in sports, all the rehab, expectations and struggles to get back to my game. Midway through my that year I was really struggling, lost 5 mph on my fastball and was getting knocked all over the park, all I wanted to do was quit as I felt that I was letting the team down and was hating every minute of it.

I ended up talking to my coach and being brutally honest, telling him how I was feeling and that I was not helping the team any by pitching and that I was burnt out. He gave me a week off practice and I was not to travel with the team the following weekend, he wanted me to relax and take it easy and regain my focus, he gave me a basic routine to keep my shoulder in shape and that was all I was allowed to do. I went to a couple sessions with our sports psychologist who gave me some perspective, relaxed and took it easy. By the time I was back at practice 1.5 weeks later I had the fire back in my gut. He surprised me by making me the opening weekend starting pitcher against the #1 team in the conference, which I ended up winning 2-1.

Since then I have learned, if I am really struggling with something and getting down on myself, its time to step back and relax. I have done this with golf as well, not only has it refreshed me but enhanced that fire to get back at it and play well.

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#26 herrsonic

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Posted 21 August 2010 - 02:38 AM

Before you quit, take a course or find someone who can teach you self confidence.  If you succeed in learning this first, you won't need to seek the answer to this question from strangers.

#27 tugger

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Posted 31 August 2010 - 02:25 PM

View Postcrothe, on 29 May 2010 - 09:04 PM, said:

When I feel like that I try to take a couple weeks off. By the end of that, the game is sucking me back in and my head is in a better place. I would also suggest a couple of books if you haven't read them yet. First, "Zen Golf" and second, Rotella's "Golf is Not A Game of Perfect." It sounds like you're a pretty good player, especially for your age. Figure out how to have fun playing golf. If you can't then you have to decide whether your addiction is strong enough or its time to take up fishing. Find some guys who are just fun to play with. I play a lot of golf with guys who couldn't break 100 on their best day but love every second of being on the course. They joke around, rag on eachother, and genuinely love the game. I find I play well and enjoy the game a lot when playing with them.

One last thing. Golf is a game you can play just about until you die. And even better, you'll never beat golf. It will always be there to challenge you. Its a great game and I definitely hope you stick with it.


+1   just follow this advice. When you get to the point that you are saying "I put so much time into this and don't get s*** out of it", the time has come to pick up Zen golf for sure!!!

#28 roll - gybe

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Posted 14 September 2010 - 05:38 PM

What Mylo said...

I was 19 when I burned out - at the time I was on the an olympic development team and a college team.  

In hindsight, I was overcoached, and I wanted all these results from all these little pieces of information I was getting.  I was trying way too hard.

Since you are a girl, this might be relevant -- one of my teams shared a coach with the girls, and they were so good about listening, that the coaches just gave them double the information that crushed me.

It took me a semester to decide to quit.  When I did, there was one more event left, and I had to go, but since I was over it, I ended up being much more natural, not caring about all the little stuff, and in the end, I totally dominated.  I realized I had changed my attitude.

A lot of young athletes/achievers need to go through something like that.  In the begining you get so much out of coaching, that you get upset when you aren't making gigantic improvements every month anymore.  --  Well, that's 'cause you got good.  Now relax, and **play** -- Playing is totally different than practicing!

Compete, have fun, be yourself, and trust your instincts.  Put it on autopilot.

#29 roll - gybe

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Posted 14 September 2010 - 05:41 PM

P.S.  - I never found the value in competing against recreational players the way crote did. That made me feel like I was moving down in the sport - plus I would lose my focus.  I just needed to have more fun and rely more on my instincts at my own level.




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