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My Son, The Disappointment


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#1 Chipwich

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Posted 15 September 2018 - 10:51 PM

So my 10 year old kid has been playing junior tournaments in Las Vegas the last 16 months.  Lots of rounds in the 100's, starting to get consistently in the low 90's lately and actually had his last two rounds on the 90 number exactly.  We had a tournament today and we talked long and hard before hand about goals and expectations.  Both he and I REALLY wanted a round in the 80's today.  He played so well but just missed.
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He shot a 76!  :lock: :partytime2:


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#2 Gilbertc13

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 12:11 AM

And here I was getting ready to flame you for whatever comments you were about to make. Congrats to him! Now keep it rolling!

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#3 sevenfourate

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 05:22 AM

Thats awesome. Good for him ! 14 shot swing on his personal best ? GO HIM.

Just gotta watch your back now. He's coming at yer...... :rockon:
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#4 Wriggles

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 06:12 AM

Let the kid enjoy the golf.  Not worry about score.

At 10, pep talk and goals will only create a neurotic kid.  Enough in the world to be neurotic about.

Good Luck to Father and son.

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#5 leezer99

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 06:28 AM

That's awesome!  What was the difference in the 76 and 90 rounds?  More GIR's, better putting, fewer penalty shots??


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#6 dpb5031

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 07:16 AM

Congrats to you and your son! That is tremendous improvement and I'm sure will really motivate him going forward!

One thing to keep in mind from a parent who's been there however, is that improvement in golf is far from linear. Easy for both kid and parent to let early success establish tough to meet expectations.

It's often one step forward and two back, and the mountain's slopes are usually steepest as you near the summit!  Helping your son to understand this will hopefully avoid the frustrations that inevitably are a part of learning this challenging game.  Good luck to both of you!
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#7 Chipwich

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 09:50 AM

 leezer99, on 16 September 2018 - 06:28 AM, said:

That's awesome!  What was the difference in the 76 and 90 rounds?  More GIR's, better putting, fewer penalty shots??

By far it was GIR by controlling the distances of his irons.  Which resulted in fewer penalties.

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#8 Chipwich

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 09:53 AM

 dpb5031, on 16 September 2018 - 07:16 AM, said:

Congrats to you and your son! That is tremendous improvement and I'm sure will really motivate him going forward!

One thing to keep in mind from a parent who's been there however, is that improvement in golf is far from linear. Easy for both kid and parent to let early success establish tough to meet expectations.

It's often one step forward and two back, and the mountain's slopes are usually steepest as you near the summit!  Helping your son to understand this will hopefully avoid the frustrations that inevitably are a part of learning this challenging game.  Good luck to both of you!

Thanks!  He knows he caught fire and shouldn't expect to break his record by 14 the next time out.  I, on the other hand, am expecting a 62 next time out.

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#9 Chipwich

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 09:56 AM

 Wriggles, on 16 September 2018 - 06:12 AM, said:

Let the kid enjoy the golf.  Not worry about score.

At 10, pep talk and goals will only create a neurotic kid.  Enough in the world to be neurotic about.

Good Luck to Father and son.

Nah, these aren't like super pressure goals and pep talks.  More like setting goals of no triples and no three putts and how to handle it if he does.  Zero encouragement for being the best, lots of encouragement for doing his best.  He loves golf and loves the competition.  All I ever wanted was a playing partner on the weekends!

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#10 tdk8180

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 10:44 AM

 Chipwich, on 16 September 2018 - 09:56 AM, said:

 Wriggles, on 16 September 2018 - 06:12 AM, said:

Let the kid enjoy the golf.  Not worry about score.

At 10, pep talk and goals will only create a neurotic kid.  Enough in the world to be neurotic about.

Good Luck to Father and son.

Nah, these aren't like super pressure goals and pep talks.  More like setting goals of no triples and no three putts and how to handle it if he does.  Zero encouragement for being the best, lots of encouragement for doing his best.  He loves golf and loves the competition.  All I ever wanted was a playing partner on the weekends!

That sounds great, but on a forum...no one here can really make any accurate comments on exactly how these talks transpire.  The tone of the conversation is key.

Otherwise, keep up the good work.  My dad told me that I needed to stop shootimg in the high 80s/90s or I wouldnt play in anymore junior events.  That was fine to say because the tourneys cost a lot of money and a lot of time.  Not until I was 18, could I shoot consistently around par.  By that time, he was only paying for my tournaments that werent sponsored by a team.  And then it became about the mental game and thinking.  The physical was there, just needed to think about the execution of how I was going to do it.

But at that point, my dads entire golf knowledge was spent on me.  Club building knowledge and getting started.  After that, I took it from there and probably have 20 times worth of knowledge about all aspects of the game.

You have to know yourself and you have to know your kid.  My dad knew enough to get me started and I figured the rest out.

Is your kid an a-hole?  Will he listen to you?  Doea he listen to you?  Does he talk back to you?   You have to look at these things and change your approach to get the most out of him.

Lets be honest here...your not going to change your kids natural personality type, so once you get that realized, youll be able to communicate with results.  

And then when hes on the Tour...you can hire a real agent, and you can have a few homes to retire into or maybe it will be like Sean OHairs situation, where you become estranged.

See where this is all going...you probably should quit the game now and put on endless interviews with Warren Buffett, so he can explain how to enjoy your life by eating McDonalds everyday and animal crackers, and never stop working.

Oops, I got off point...good luck to you and your boy.  Im sure he will be fine.  Just dont let him watch Bryson DeShamwow

Edited by tdk8180, 16 September 2018 - 10:58 AM.


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#11 PeanutsDaddy

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 05:04 PM

I'm sure a testament to the investment you've both made.    Congratulations to you, your son, and those that support his efforts.

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#12 Chipwich

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 06:57 PM

Round two today was a quick and painful regression.  He shot a 79!  I have no idea what clicked, but boy, it sure did start clicking!

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#13 Cwebb

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 07:02 PM

Wow.  Never heard of anyone breaking 80 for the first time....and going lower than the previous best by that many

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#14 Guia

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 07:15 PM

Wow.  He is a prodigy, and you are a hell of a pep talker.

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#15 kekoa

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 11:18 PM

Big congrats!!!!


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#16 Tannerbug33

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Posted 18 September 2018 - 04:27 PM

 Chipwich, on 16 September 2018 - 06:57 PM, said:

Round two today was a quick and painful regression.  He shot a 79!  I have no idea what clicked, but boy, it sure did start clicking!

If you ever figure out what clicked you could make Trump look poor. They're are thousands of people out there spending a lot of money to improve there golf game.
please remember me 1st 😁

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#17 Llortamaisey

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Posted 18 September 2018 - 04:33 PM

I’ve heard so many stories like this. It happened to me in a similar way when I was a junior golfer. Sometimes breaking through a barrier by a large margin can be a significant game changer. I hope your son continues his fine play. There’s nothing better than father/son bonding after low rounds.

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#18 TigerMom

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Posted Yesterday, 05:24 AM

You should be proud not disappointed

76 is a very good score

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