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How patient do I need to be with my 9 year old daughter?


85 replies to this topic

#31 wildcatden

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Posted 11 September 2018 - 10:48 PM

View Postkiller21, on 11 September 2018 - 10:15 PM, said:

View PostSocrates, on 11 September 2018 - 05:30 PM, said:

I think you guys are wasting your keyboard fingers.  The OP checked out about 18 posts ago.

??

@Killer21 - The post is just your typical internet forum stuff.  Regarding your daughter, she either wants to get good at golf or she doesn't. At age 9, she still has lots of time to get better.

Below is some sage advice from TigerMom on internet postings in a public forum and what to do with them.  This post below is one of my favorite posts from 2018.

View PostTigerMom, on 22 August 2018 - 08:23 PM, said:

This is internet

You post and get replies you don’t want to hear?  IGNORE what you think is not relevant

Take what is useful and adjust frame of mind and world view as needed

If you think you are right anyway, stick to it

Crying will not help


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#32 Socrates

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Posted 12 September 2018 - 04:37 PM

View Postkiller21, on 11 September 2018 - 10:15 PM, said:

View PostSocrates, on 11 September 2018 - 05:30 PM, said:

I think you guys are wasting your keyboard fingers.  The OP checked out about 18 posts ago.

??
I "said" that since virtually all the advice was contrary to setting this young girl on a path to the LPGA by the time she was 12, and there was no response from yourself.  I think the best advice was from the first response ("she's 9...").   Guide, not force.
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#33 killer21

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Posted 12 September 2018 - 09:41 PM

View PostSocrates, on 12 September 2018 - 04:37 PM, said:

View Postkiller21, on 11 September 2018 - 10:15 PM, said:

View PostSocrates, on 11 September 2018 - 05:30 PM, said:

I think you guys are wasting your keyboard fingers.  The OP checked out about 18 posts ago.

??
I "said" that since virtually all the advice was contrary to setting this young girl on a path to the LPGA by the time she was 12, and there was no response from yourself.  I think the best advice was from the first response ("she's 9...").   Guide, not force.

It was late, I went to bed. I wasn't avoided the responses. Thanks for clarifying though. I appreciate the effort and the fact she is only 9. I did tell her today how proud I was of her and that she is playing great and only going to continue to improve! This discussion did help.
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#34 benhays98

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Posted 14 September 2018 - 04:21 PM

View Postkiller21, on 11 September 2018 - 10:11 PM, said:

This is very true! I try not to be "that" dad.

In no way am I attacking you, but, it sounds like you are headed that way.

Unfortunately, I was that dad to my oldest son, when he was 9-10 years old. He now hates basketball. Read "hate" with every ounce of true venom that a person can muster. That hate is because of me. I thought that I was doing the right things; great coach, pointing out where he could improve, analyzing film, etc., etc. In the end, I realized that I had never concerned myself with what he wanted or if he was even having fun.

Fast forward, he now plays football at a very high level. I only concern myself with supporting him emotionally. If he goes far in football, great; if he doesn't great. I only hope (read as occasionally nudge but never push or force) that he pushes himself to be the best version of who he can be. I am there to ask if he had a good practice, to hug him in both joy of victory and the agony of defeat and to always tell him that I am always truly proud of him and the man is becoming. This has had a cascading effect to all 3 of my sons and our relationships with each other.

I now live by a mantra of "I am no more than the banks of the river. Where that river flows is up to him."

Edited by benhays98, 14 September 2018 - 04:22 PM.


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#35 Tannerbug33

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Posted 14 September 2018 - 04:44 PM

View Postbenhays98, on 14 September 2018 - 04:21 PM, said:

View Postkiller21, on 11 September 2018 - 10:11 PM, said:

This is very true! I try not to be "that" dad.

In no way am I attacking you, but, it sounds like you are headed that way.

Unfortunately, I was that dad to my oldest son, when he was 9-10 years old. He now hates basketball. Read "hate" with every ounce of true venom that a person can muster. That hate is because of me. I thought that I was doing the right things; great coach, pointing out where he could improve, analyzing film, etc., etc. In the end, I realized that I had never concerned myself with what he wanted or if he was even having fun.

Fast forward, he now plays football at a very high level. I only concern myself with supporting him emotionally. If he goes far in football, great; if he doesn't great. I only hope (read as occasionally nudge but never push or force) that he pushes himself to be the best version of who he can be. I am there to ask if he had a good practice, to hug him in both joy of victory and the agony of defeat and to always tell him that I am always truly proud of him and the man is becoming. This has had a cascading effect to all 3 of my sons and our relationships with each other.

I now live by a mantra of "I am no more than the banks of the river. Where that river flows is up to him."


I think I'm just a bank acct. 😁


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#36 TigerMom

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 06:26 AM

So many strange responses

Every kid is different

There are actually kids who listen to their parents and just do what they are told, without rebelling

You constantly tell the child why you are making them do something they don’t want to do - that it is for their own good

Eventually they get it even if they don’t like it

And often they thank you for it later

You also have to show them that your love is not dependent on their success

Of course you can be happier when they do succeed, and almost every young kid wants to please her parent

If that drives them to work harder and want to win, what is wrong with that?

Do you think Tiger Woods didn’t want to make his parents happy when he was young?

With regards to the initial question about patience, you should really assess what your daughter’s natural potential (ceiling?) is and be realistic about goals

This is easier in certain sports like track & field, where if you are not naturally really fast you are never going to compete at a really high level as a sprinter

Where golf lies on that spectrum is hard to say

I would think innate, uncontrollable factors like height, arm length and body composition are less important for golf than for basketball, etc

But skill is still important - so if she does not have very strong coordination and natural talent already then aiming for LPGA probably unrealistic

Playing at college level probably still achievable, if get proper coaching and have the right mentality and work really hard


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#37 leezer99

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 06:33 AM

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 06:26 AM, said:

So many strange responses

Every kid is different

There are actually kids who listen to their parents and just do what they are told, without rebelling

You constantly tell the child why you are making them do something they don’t want to do - that it is for their own good

Eventually they get it even if they don’t like it

And often they thank you for it later

You also have to show them that your love is not dependent on their success

Of course you can be happier when they do succeed, and almost every young kid wants to please her parent

If that drives them to work harder and want to win, what is wrong with that?

Do you think Tiger Woods didn’t want to make his parents happy when he was young?

With regards to the initial question about patience, you should really assess what your daughter’s natural potential (ceiling?) is and be realistic about goals

This is easier in certain sports like track & field, where if you are not naturally really fast you are never going to compete at a really high level as a sprinter

Where golf lies on that spectrum is hard to say

I would think innate, uncontrollable factors like height, arm length and body composition are less important for golf than for basketball, etc

But skill is still important - so if she does not have very strong coordination and natural talent already then aiming for LPGA probably unrealistic

Playing at college level probably still achievable, if get proper coaching and have the right mentality and work really hard

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Way.

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#38 dpb5031

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 07:02 AM

I agree with TigerMom above. Every kid is different, both in natural ability and personality.

Let Earl Woods raise a million other kids the same way he did Tiger I'd bet heavily he would not produce another major champion.

Some kids are pleasers. They'll do whatever it takes to fulfill their parent's wishes.

Others are the opposite and will rebel, often choosing the opposite of what their parents would prefer.

It's tough to find a balance between encouragement and pushing too hard. It helps to know what makes your kid tick and acknowledging that they're all different.

Some parents are indeed way over the top. I find it just as annoying and often condascending however, when folks on these message boards start with the holier than thou preaching of "just let them be kids and have fun, they'll figure it out on their own," when parents come on here looking for advice on how to deal with their juniors. That might work for some, but not the majority in my experience.

My daughter plays D1 golf on a full scholarship.  I can guarantee you that had I just left it up to her there'd be no chance of this. Most successful junior players have at least one parent who is heavily involved and pushing to some extent.

Most kids are impulsive and short sighted. It's natural, and part of being a kid. They need a parent to guide them and keep them on track, whether its homework, sports, or simply cleaning up after themselves.  Discipline, commitment,  and perseverance don't always come naturally.

When my daughter was young we would sit down together to map out her tournaments for the season. Many times that meant traveling and all of the associated expenses. I'd make it very clear that I was happy to pay for it all as long as she'd agree to prepare appropriately. Many times she'd need to be reminded of this, and on occasion we'd have some battles.

I'll also share that I tried to get my first daughter into golf, great kid (adult now) and great student, but from a very young age she had what I called "Iknowitis." I know dad, I know how to do it. This is the way I do it...lol as she'd hit grounders! She became a decent rower, so she found her sport, but she never took to golf.

My younger one was the opposite and way more coachable. To this day she asks me to critique her swing. It also helped that she is naturally athletic.  Again, they're all different, and the more promise your junior athlete shows, and the more advanced they get into their sport, the tougher it is to find the right balance

Edited by dpb5031, 16 September 2018 - 07:04 AM.

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#39 Redjeep83

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

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#40 TigerMom

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 07:44 AM

View Postleezer99, on 16 September 2018 - 06:33 AM, said:

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 06:26 AM, said:

So many strange responses

Every kid is different

There are actually kids who listen to their parents and just do what they are told, without rebelling

You constantly tell the child why you are making them do something they don’t want to do - that it is for their own good

Eventually they get it even if they don’t like it

And often they thank you for it later

You also have to show them that your love is not dependent on their success

Of course you can be happier when they do succeed, and almost every young kid wants to please her parent

If that drives them to work harder and want to win, what is wrong with that?

Do you think Tiger Woods didn’t want to make his parents happy when he was young?

With regards to the initial question about patience, you should really assess what your daughter’s natural potential (ceiling?) is and be realistic about goals

This is easier in certain sports like track & field, where if you are not naturally really fast you are never going to compete at a really high level as a sprinter

Where golf lies on that spectrum is hard to say

I would think innate, uncontrollable factors like height, arm length and body composition are less important for golf than for basketball, etc

But skill is still important - so if she does not have very strong coordination and natural talent already then aiming for LPGA probably unrealistic

Playing at college level probably still achievable, if get proper coaching and have the right mentality and work really hard

I

Can't

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Out

Why

Your

Response

Is

Written

This

Way.

For people who like to push buttons


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#41 TigerMom

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 07:46 AM

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM, said:

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

What obsession?

A parent shouldn't try to help child?

How many kids do you know who like to do everything that is good for them on their own, without prodding from parents?

NONE

Maybe this type of attitude is why Americans are falling behind the rest of the world in many things

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#42 Redjeep83

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 07:51 AM

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 07:46 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM, said:

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

What obsession?

A parent shouldn't try to help child?

How many kids do you know who like to do everything that is good for them on their own, without prodding from parents?

NONE

Maybe this type of attitude is why Americans are falling behind the rest of the world in many things

Sheís 9, you think that is good for her? Itís about having fun. Play some tournaments yourself and feel the pressure, maybe it will be eye opening

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#43 BertGA

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 09:24 AM

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 07:46 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM, said:

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

What obsession?

A parent shouldn't try to help child?

How many kids do you know who like to do everything that is good for them on their own, without prodding from parents?

NONE

Maybe this type of attitude is why Americans are falling behind the rest of the world in many things

You must be kidding. At some level you at least have to understand there are cultural differences at play here.

Much like there are different kinds of kids, there are different kinds of parenting AND coaching. The best coaches either 1) have their own method and mold the players to that, or 2) find a unique way to motivate each individual athlete. If you have the luxury of selecting your players, like Bill Belichick, you can be the same old A-hole and squeeze every bit of talent out of them. As a parent, unless you like adopting young athletes from broken families, you donít get to choose your team. It is given to you. So you have to find a way to motivate each one.

If your model is so perfect, then please tell us how every single premiere athlete was raised in this same high-pressure, demanding childhood. And how no child, ever, blamed their parents for pressuring them so hard they learned to hate the sport, and loathe their parents for it.

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#44 dpb5031

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 09:25 AM

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:51 AM, said:

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 07:46 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM, said:

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

What obsession?

A parent shouldn't try to help child?

How many kids do you know who like to do everything that is good for them on their own, without prodding from parents?

NONE

Maybe this type of attitude is why Americans are falling behind the rest of the world in many things

Sheís 9, you think that is good for her? Itís about having fun. Play some tournaments yourself and feel the pressure, maybe it will be eye opening

Red jeep, serious question, do you have children?
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#45 DixieD

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 09:34 AM

VERY is the answer here, not every kid will make the grade, but you could enjoy a whole life of golf with her which most parents would kill for if you don't push her away.


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#46 leezer99

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 11:25 AM

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 07:46 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM, said:

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

What obsession?

A parent shouldn't try to help child?

How many kids do you know who like to do everything that is good for them on their own, without prodding from parents?

NONE

Maybe this type of attitude is why Americans are falling behind the rest of the world in many things
I actually agree with this sentiment. Kids do need prodding to do what's right sometimes. How you prod them is the real question and probably different for each kid. Some need a kick in the butt while others do better with a carrot on the end of a stick.

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#47 dpb5031

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 11:35 AM

View Postleezer99, on 16 September 2018 - 11:25 AM, said:

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 07:46 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM, said:

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

What obsession?

A parent shouldn't try to help child?

How many kids do you know who like to do everything that is good for them on their own, without prodding from parents?

NONE

Maybe this type of attitude is why Americans are falling behind the rest of the world in many things
I actually agree with this sentiment. Kids do need prodding to do what's right sometimes. How you prod them is the real question and probably different for each kid. Some need a kick in the butt while others do better with a carrot on the end of a stick.

EXACTLY!  And until you've bee through it as a parent I'm sorry, but you really can't relate.
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#48 Redjeep83

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 11:52 AM

View Postleezer99, on 16 September 2018 - 11:25 AM, said:

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 07:46 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM, said:

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

What obsession?

A parent shouldn't try to help child?

How many kids do you know who like to do everything that is good for them on their own, without prodding from parents?

NONE

Maybe this type of attitude is why Americans are falling behind the rest of the world in many things
I actually agree with this sentiment. Kids do need prodding to do what's right sometimes. How you prod them is the real question and probably different for each kid. Some need a kick in the butt while others do better with a carrot on the end of a stick.

I agree with setting the stage for them to exceed, however, this thread is about the kid not putting up good enough scores to win. You set them up to exceed and help them along making sure that is what they want to do and enjoy it or they will burn out by the time they become teenagers. At the age of nine, it doesnít matter if the scores arenít coming, just make sure they are enjoying it

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#49 Redjeep83

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 11:55 AM

View Postdpb5031, on 16 September 2018 - 09:25 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:51 AM, said:

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 07:46 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM, said:

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

What obsession?

A parent shouldn't try to help child?

How many kids do you know who like to do everything that is good for them on their own, without prodding from parents?

NONE

Maybe this type of attitude is why Americans are falling behind the rest of the world in many things

Sheís 9, you think that is good for her? Itís about having fun. Play some tournaments yourself and feel the pressure, maybe it will be eye opening

Red jeep, serious question, do you have children?

No but I was a junior golfer when I was a kid and played the tournaments. Were you? serious question

Edited by Redjeep83, 16 September 2018 - 11:55 AM.


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#50 leezer99

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 12:15 PM

View Postdpb5031, on 16 September 2018 - 11:35 AM, said:

View Postleezer99, on 16 September 2018 - 11:25 AM, said:

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 07:46 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM, said:

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

What obsession?

A parent shouldn't try to help child?

How many kids do you know who like to do everything that is good for them on their own, without prodding from parents?

NONE

Maybe this type of attitude is why Americans are falling behind the rest of the world in many things
I actually agree with this sentiment. Kids do need prodding to do what's right sometimes. How you prod them is the real question and probably different for each kid. Some need a kick in the butt while others do better with a carrot on the end of a stick.

EXACTLY!  And until you've bee through it as a parent I'm sorry, but you really can't relate.
I can't tell if you're agreeing with me or not. I've got two kids and both are polar opposites. The young one is self motivated and just needs me to challenge her. The older one is motivated to perform when he sees results. It's weird but he'll practice more after shooting under par than if he has a terrible round.

I'll admit I did lose the intent of this thread.


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#51 dpb5031

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 01:52 PM

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 11:55 AM, said:

View Postdpb5031, on 16 September 2018 - 09:25 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:51 AM, said:

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 07:46 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM, said:

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

What obsession?

A parent shouldn't try to help child?

How many kids do you know who like to do everything that is good for them on their own, without prodding from parents?

NONE

Maybe this type of attitude is why Americans are falling behind the rest of the world in many things

Sheís 9, you think that is good for her? Itís about having fun. Play some tournaments yourself and feel the pressure, maybe it will be eye opening

Red jeep, serious question, do you have children?

No but I was a junior golfer when I was a kid and played the tournaments. Were you? serious question

Didn't start golf til mid-late twenties, but played other sports at pretty decent levels as a junior, including tennis. I was ranked nationally as a 12 year old in tennis but ended up quitting the sport in high school to pursue the typical HS football, basketball, and baseball. Also completed nationally in body building, but that's another story...lol. In hindsight wish my folks made me stick with tennis.

I've been down to scratch as a golfer (1.5 index now) and have competed extensively for a 50 year old who took the game up late.  I've won my club championship, some county stuff, and remain competitive making cuts in state golf association events even against the young guys, so I know what it's like to be under the gun.

I've also been through all the challenges of junior golf with my daughter who was also a good lacrosse, soccer, and basketball player.  I knew golf was the golden ticket, so I kept her going in it even when she was less than enthused because it was very solitary for her with no local friends to play/practice with. She played in 2 USGA national championships and top ten on the national Big I as a junior and won many local/regional events.  Now shes on a D1 full ride.

Best compliment I ever got was caddying for my daughter, then 16, in the US Women's Amateur in Portland OR.  The official assigned to our group said after the round that we were the best parent/child - player/caddy pair she'd ever seen in terms of getting along with one another...lol.

Edited by dpb5031, 16 September 2018 - 02:25 PM.

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#52 Rohlio

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 02:44 PM

I let my daughter play or practice as much or as little as she likes...the only thing she is not allowed to do is complain about being unable to do something other kids can do if she is not putting in the practice time. This goes for golf, dance, gymnastics, etc.

I don't care if she wins or loses at golf. I care that she understands that you can't be good at things without trying, but if she doesn't want to be good at a particular sport or activity, that is fine.

Your daughter is 9 years old...if she doesn't have the passion to practice to get better, then perhaps you just play together for fun. Why does it matter to you if she wins or loses?

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#53 PeanutsDaddy

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 03:44 PM

Plenty of research pertaining to the positive and negative results of 'Tiger Mom' parenting.   These discussions are tough to have if we are going to speak in absolutes.  Too many variables at work.  What may be best practice for my 9 year old may not be best for yours.  

I do believe that we should be having fun.   What 'fun' is may be up for debate.

In a world filled with too many absentee parents it's nice to read of a father taking an interest in their child.

Good luck with your daughter.
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#54 YoungJedi

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 04:16 PM

Seems like you’re trying to relive something in your childhood that you weren’t able to obtain. As others said. She’s 9.

Has until about junior/senior year of HIGH SCHOOL to figure out if she wants to play college.

If she doesn’t want to....great. Let her find something she’s passionate about and wants to spend her time doing. It’s your job to support that.

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#55 YoungJedi

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 04:21 PM

View PostYoungJedi, on 16 September 2018 - 04:16 PM, said:

Seems like you’re trying to relive something in your childhood that you weren’t able to obtain. As others said. She’s 9.

Has until about junior/senior year of HIGH SCHOOL to figure out if she wants to play college.

If she doesn’t want to....great. Let her find something she’s passionate about and wants to spend her time doing. It’s your job to support that.


Also just watch trophy kids on Netflix and we can /Thread


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#56 leezer99

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 04:39 PM

View PostYoungJedi, on 16 September 2018 - 04:21 PM, said:

View PostYoungJedi, on 16 September 2018 - 04:16 PM, said:

Seems like you’re trying to relive something in your childhood that you weren’t able to obtain. As others said. She’s 9.

Has until about junior/senior year of HIGH SCHOOL to figure out if she wants to play college.

If she doesn’t want to....great. Let her find something she’s passionate about and wants to spend her time doing. It’s your job to support that.


Also just watch trophy kids on Netflix and we can /Thread
The basketball dad that spent enough for two Ferrari's was my favorite.

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#57 Redjeep83

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 07:07 PM

View Postleezer99, on 16 September 2018 - 04:39 PM, said:

View PostYoungJedi, on 16 September 2018 - 04:21 PM, said:

View PostYoungJedi, on 16 September 2018 - 04:16 PM, said:

Seems like you’re trying to relive something in your childhood that you weren’t able to obtain. As others said. She’s 9.

Has until about junior/senior year of HIGH SCHOOL to figure out if she wants to play college.

If she doesn’t want to....great. Let her find something she’s passionate about and wants to spend her time doing. It’s your job to support that.


Also just watch trophy kids on Netflix and we can /Thread
The basketball dad that spent enough for two Ferrari's was my favorite.

I haven’t seen it but I imagine it’s pretty disturbing, probably couldn’t take it. There are tons of kids in the ghetto who would school most in basketball. Most don’t have parents pushing them to play or any financial backing from parents, just a desire for the sport.

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#58 Cwebb

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 07:15 PM

Think of it as a marathon, not a sprint

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#59 dpb5031

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Posted 16 September 2018 - 07:19 PM

View PostYoungJedi, on 16 September 2018 - 04:16 PM, said:

Seems like youíre trying to relive something in your childhood that you werenít able to obtain. As others said. Sheís 9.

Has until about junior/senior year of HIGH SCHOOL to figure out if she wants to play college.

If she doesnít want to....great. Let her find something sheís passionate about and wants to spend her time doing. Itís your job to support that.

I know where you're coming from with this statement (and I understand it's very well intended), but you couldnt be further from the truth.  Most top level D1 women's golf recruits verbally commit between the 8th and 10th grade.  

Not that I agree with it, but if you're waiting til junior or senior year of high school, you've missed the boat.
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#60 TigerMom

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Posted 17 September 2018 - 07:21 AM

View PostBertGA, on 16 September 2018 - 09:24 AM, said:

View PostTigerMom, on 16 September 2018 - 07:46 AM, said:

View PostRedjeep83, on 16 September 2018 - 07:41 AM, said:

Killer, what are your scores like? I think you should compete in some gong tournament too so you can relate? Maybe it will take the obsession of you playing golf through your daughter

What obsession?

A parent shouldn't try to help child?

How many kids do you know who like to do everything that is good for them on their own, without prodding from parents?

NONE

Maybe this type of attitude is why Americans are falling behind the rest of the world in many things

You must be kidding. At some level you at least have to understand there are cultural differences at play here.

Much like there are different kinds of kids, there are different kinds of parenting AND coaching. The best coaches either 1) have their own method and mold the players to that, or 2) find a unique way to motivate each individual athlete. If you have the luxury of selecting your players, like Bill Belichick, you can be the same old A-hole and squeeze every bit of talent out of them. As a parent, unless you like adopting young athletes from broken families, you don't get to choose your team. It is given to you. So you have to find a way to motivate each one.

If your model is so perfect, then please tell us how every single premiere athlete was raised in this same high-pressure, demanding childhood. And how no child, ever, blamed their parents for pressuring them so hard they learned to hate the sport, and loathe their parents for it.

I am confused by your comment

are you replying to me?

yeah, I think almost every single premier LPGA tour player (except freaks like Thompson) grew up in a high pressure, demanding environment

do you disagree?


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