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Our greens are so fast that "________"


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#1 LCP

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Posted 16 December 2017 - 09:07 PM

Our greens are so fast that "when I bent over to mark my ball and put some weight on my putter in my hand my putter slid away and I almost fell over."  It's our newest 9 redone earlier in the year.  What's that gonna stimp? About 15? Maybe more? Things were downright scary.  I had a high pitching wedge hit the front of one green and go over. Balls were rolling on their own on slopes after coming to a stop.


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#2 Qqq123xx

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Posted 16 December 2017 - 09:17 PM

"I don't bother putting."
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#3 Medic

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Posted 16 December 2017 - 09:17 PM

The greens at Disney are so fast that when it rains the water all drains off as fast as it falls. Fast and strong sloped. An easy three or more putt.....
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#4 Swisstrader98

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Posted 16 December 2017 - 09:31 PM

I love fast greens

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#5 Petunia Sprinkle

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Posted 16 December 2017 - 09:45 PM

Didnít Gary McCord once (or twice) make some remark about bikini waxed greens?


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#6 sdandrea

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Posted 16 December 2017 - 09:47 PM

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#7 Conrad1953

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Posted 16 December 2017 - 09:59 PM

Fast and hard are 2 different things. I like fast...but don't care for concrete.
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#8 cardoustie

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Posted 16 December 2017 - 10:10 PM

Slipperier than a greased pig on amphetamines
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#9 LCP

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Posted 16 December 2017 - 10:59 PM

View PostConrad1953, on 16 December 2017 - 09:59 PM, said:

Fast and hard are 2 different things. I like fast...but don't care for concrete.

I think we've got both on this course right now. 7 months on them and I doubt I've had to repair more than a dozen ball marks on the green.

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#10 SBH9458

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 07:40 AM

I absolutely love fast, predictable greens. If one green is fast and the next slow....not so much.


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#11 cagecitizen

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 08:03 AM

More slippery than bacon grease.
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#12 596

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 08:23 AM

Our greens are so fast.............everyone complains!

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#13 SixtySomePing

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 09:11 AM

Our greens are so fast...  how fast are they? They're so fast that you now drive for show and dough....

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#14 Nard_S

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 09:31 AM

Our greens are fast but they maintain the moisture level and test it daily. They roll the greens everyday too. Result is they accept & hold shots but roll fast and true. They're perfect.

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#15 phil75070

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 09:40 AM

....you tread lightly lest the vibration causes the ball to start moving again.

I like fast greens.....provided the hole locations are reasonable and aren't on steep slopes or at the edge of a ridge. Too often the hole is cut by a maintenance worker who has little to no knowledge of how golf is played and just cuts the hole within the grid designated for that day.


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#16 No Catchy Nickname

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 09:48 AM

View PostSBH9458, on 17 December 2017 - 07:40 AM, said:

I absolutely love fast, predictable greens. If one green is fast and the next slow....not so much.

Even worse: fast but bumpy.
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#17 MtlJeff

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 10:29 AM

Our greens aren't ridiculously fast, but they are ridiculously sloped in some areas, especially on one of the 9's.

The 8th hole on one of our 9's, in midsummer when they are at their quickest you can drop a ball from waist level on one side of the green and it will roll off the green on the other side. And this green is probably 30-35yds wide.
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#18 BNGL

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 11:06 AM

View PostLCP, on 16 December 2017 - 10:59 PM, said:

View PostConrad1953, on 16 December 2017 - 09:59 PM, said:

Fast and hard are 2 different things. I like fast...but don't care for concrete.

I think we've got both on this course right now. 7 months on them and I doubt I've had to repair more than a dozen ball marks on the green.

If they're new greens they are hard because of a lack of thatch. The thatch layer is  necessary buildup of organic material that comes from plant growth. Give it a growing season or two and you'll see different results in approach shots holding greens.


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#19 2putttom

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 12:11 PM

" these greens are so fast a yak turd would roll ten feet past on a three footer."

Edited by 2putttom, 17 December 2017 - 12:44 PM.

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#20 BNGL

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 12:11 PM

View PostConrad1953, on 16 December 2017 - 09:59 PM, said:

Fast and hard are 2 different things. I like fast...but don't care for concrete.

Absolutely. It's possible to have a green that is extremely firm but stimp 8 feet, conversely I have played a course that I left footprints on greens that ran 10 plus. Speed is about reducing friction on the leaf blade.


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#21 farmer

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 12:59 PM

So fast you have to wear real spikes just to walk on them?  So fast your ball marker slides?

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#22 markjay1

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 01:46 PM

My course's greens are so fast Usain Bolt was impressed.

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#23 LCP

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 02:18 PM

View Postphil75070, on 17 December 2017 - 09:40 AM, said:

....you tread lightly lest the vibration causes the ball to start moving again.

I like fast greens.....provided the hole locations are reasonable and aren't on steep slopes or at the edge of a ridge. Too often the hole is cut by a maintenance worker who has little to no knowledge of how golf is played and just cuts the hole within the grid designated for that day.

Oh, we've got that every day of the week too!

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#24 b.helts

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 03:29 PM

Our greens are so fast the kids come out with Jagermeister and ice blocks and ride them.

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#25 Greenie

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 04:36 PM


Our greens are so fast that "_we always put to much mustard on the ball"


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#26 andrue

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 04:41 PM

Our greens are so fast that even the slugs wear crash helmets.
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#27 fillwelix

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 06:22 PM

Our greens are so fast the grounds crew wears skates to cut the holes
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#28 Lijka

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 07:13 PM

Our greens are so fast the ball doesn't roll, it just slides.
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#29 Pomps

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 07:30 PM

The worst is what we have a lot here in the northeast. Some older golf courses built greens with a ton of undulation which was okay with longer grass of 100 years ago. When they roll them and get them to 12 or more on the stimp today, you have putts that are uphill, miss the cup, stop six inches behind the hole, then reverse and roll back down the hill beyond where you originally putted from. Unless you make that putt, the same keeps happening. It defines stupid.

Edited by Pomps, 17 December 2017 - 07:32 PM.

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#30 Shades234

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Posted 17 December 2017 - 08:16 PM

View PostPetunia Sprinkle, on 16 December 2017 - 09:45 PM, said:

Didn’t Gary McCord once (or twice) make some remark about bikini waxed greens?
yeah. Augusta National didn't appreciate it.

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