Just had the first baby, how do I play golf?
Posted 09 December 2017 - 09:22 PM
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Posted 09 December 2017 - 09:30 PM
Posted 09 December 2017 - 09:39 PM
Posted 09 December 2017 - 09:44 PM
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Posted 09 December 2017 - 11:17 PM
So it's not just the wife, you of course want to make sure you're not missing precious moments or time w the baby, for yourself too.
Here's what I've noticed helps: don't play courses too far from home, don't be gone all day (lotsa range before and 19th hole), and don't do it after work, bc the wife needs the day broken up, and the consecutive hours away add up. So if I can pop off for 9 on a weekday, I stop home first and give her a break.
When I play on weekends I take the earliest tee times while they're still sleeping. Boom, 2 hours saved.
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Posted 09 December 2017 - 11:23 PM
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Posted 09 December 2017 - 11:31 PM
Good luck and congrats.
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Posted 10 December 2017 - 02:19 AM
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Posted 10 December 2017 - 02:44 AM
Most of my friends games go downhill in the first few years before they get playing as regularly again
Posted 10 December 2017 - 08:25 AM
I bought childrens components from Golfworks in Ohio. when they were about 4 or 5. Even though they wanted to hit rocks with them too, it was ok.
they live 2 hours and 6 hours away now. but we still try to get away as often as possible.
you might have to wait a year or two. but taking a child with you, can be quite fun. just go at a time that it wont bother the other golfers to much. and both of my sons have told me that when they go back to their home town, that people in Walmart or the mall come up to them and recognize them. They are told they were so polite and a pleasure to be around.
People used to give them golf balls they found, boy I will tell you they would lose a lot.
You have it all to look forward to. Be proud, keep your head the normal size. Forget them being the next Ricky Fowler, or some other pro. Its a family thing. I have fond memories. Enjoy yours yet to come.
Posted 10 December 2017 - 08:56 AM
Edited by SPY ZINGER, 10 December 2017 - 08:57 AM.
Posted 10 December 2017 - 09:03 AM
My daughter's are 21 and 18, so I've been through it. I played regularly even when they were babies, but it takes some compromise and also being assertive with your spouse about how important golf is to you. You've got to give something to get something.
When my kids were small I'd wake up early with them on the weekends, get them bathed and dressed for the day, then either cook them breakfast, or when they got a bit older, take them out to breakfast. My wife enjoyed sleeping in on the weekends so she appreciated this. By around 9:30, she'd be up and ready to take over while I'd head out for my 10 a.m. game. We'd typically meet back up at our club's pool at around 3 pm where we'd spend the remainder of the day together with the kids.
In all honesty it's not that difficult when they're really young. Once they get older and are involved in a myriad of sports and other activities it will be more challenging because you won't want to miss their games, etc. By that time though I had a work schedule that afforded me the opportunity to flex my time so I could get out of work early one day per week to play a 1 pm game and still be home for dinner.
Another thing I'd recommend if it's doable for your budget is joining a family-friendly country club that is close in proximity to your house. My kids grew up at our club and my younger one is currently on a D1 full ride for golf.
We've traveled extensively together for junior golf over the years and have played together at places like Forest Highlands, Dye Preseve, Medalist, Bears Club, Grand Cypress, PGA National, Pinehurst, Merion, Punta Espada in the Dominican Republic, Bandon Dunes and many many other phenomenal golf courses and destinations! She actually just returned from an overseas trip to Scotland with her team where they played St. Andrews, Carnoustie, and some other historic greats. Sadly the team had more chaperones than they needed so I didn't get to go! 😵
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Posted 10 December 2017 - 10:27 AM
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Posted 10 December 2017 - 10:35 AM
Easy fix - adjust your schedule as needed. Don't be gone too often when mommy & baby need you most. Does that mean that your golf schedule might be different than in the past? Of course. But it's worth it and it's temporary. If you can't see the worth or are unwilling to try - you're gonna have a rough life. LOL Golf in it's present state will always be there when time allows....but your kid/family relationship might not be. Which is more important? Pretty simple.
Edited by ChipDriver, 10 December 2017 - 10:37 AM.
Posted 10 December 2017 - 05:25 PM
It's not all about you anymore, take the time and enjoy the ride. Golf time will come, but Mom also needs her time for what ever. My most memorable days are when it was just the girls (17-18 now) and me, stroller and all. As others have said time with your kids is not time wasted.
Edited by mjforn, 10 December 2017 - 05:26 PM.
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Posted 10 December 2017 - 05:44 PM
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Posted 10 December 2017 - 06:34 PM
Driver: 2016 Taylormade M2, Kai'li 70x
3W: Callaway 3deep, PX blue 6.5
3H: Adams Super XTD, Aldila Proto 95x
4-PW: Mizuno MP-32, satin PX 6.5
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Posted 10 December 2017 - 09:51 PM
Posted 11 December 2017 - 12:40 AM
Does your wife work? Full time? Part time? Stay at home mom?
Do you work full time? M-F? Weekends?
Do you have parents nearby who can watch your child?
How much golf were you playing before and what would be an acceptable amount now?
Without knowing the answer to these questions I'll make some assumptions and give advice anyway. Because, hey - this is golfwrx.
If your desire is to get out and play at least one time a week I'd say that's totally doable. It is best if your wife has a hobby or something she likes to do with her time. You just trade off. For example, Saturday morning you play golf while she watches the child, Saturday afternoon she does her activity while you watch the child. Saturday evening you all get together.
The real trouble starts when you have multiple kids and they are very active with sports or other activities. But as long as you can play man-on-man defense with the child you should be fine.
Posted 11 December 2017 - 08:26 AM
See if you can find a couple in the same situation. Get out yourself with him, get your wife out with her. Couple of guys babysitting gets big brownie points.
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Posted 11 December 2017 - 08:29 AM
But, much more importantly, do more around the house than you were doing before the baby. Be the one to clean toilets, showers, sweep floors, do laundry, clean the kitchen and wash baby bottles. Just do more around the house and she won't be mad that you spent a few hours on your hobby but left her with everything to do around the house. Not saying to do everything, but step up and don't give her a reason to hate you leaving the house for a few hours.
Second - do little things for her. Doesn't have to be extravagant, cook breakfast on an occasional weekend. Whatever she likes to do, be a part of it. Give her time for her hobby too.
3rd - be reasonable. If you were spending 20 hours a week on golf then you're probably going to have to cut back. You habe a kid now and he should be a bigger priority than golf. The good thing is that he'll sleep a lot so you'll be able to get out for some practice when he naps. Your practice/play ratio may have to change and you'll play 9 more often.
The best thing though, you will get to involve your son in the game. Get him a plastic set when he turns 1 and let him whack away in the house. As he gets older you'll be able to take him out to play with you. And if you're supporting your wife's hobby then she'll be more inclined to come out with you and the boy every now and then to keep an eye on him while you play.
Edited by getitdaily, 11 December 2017 - 08:31 AM.
Posted 11 December 2017 - 08:33 AM
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Posted 11 December 2017 - 09:43 AM
we did drive my 6 week old to Hilton Head from Maryland..he is 14 now and has no memory of the drive. if he did, he would have remembered we drove back in the mother of all storms in the winter of 2004. took 16 hours to get to Maryland. oh i played harbour Town and met Ron Howard's son. Played 18 holes with this very well grounded 14-15 year old. It was fun.
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Posted 11 December 2017 - 01:36 PM
Then, make yourself available for a benefit scramble each month. Less pressure when others can help out on the score.
About age 10, the kid can caddie for you, and you can get quality time on the links!
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Posted 11 December 2017 - 01:53 PM
It's really quite simple...
When you're home: be present, be helpful. If you see your wife doing something and think, "damn I'm glad that isn't me" (diaper blowout, up all night, puke mess) then you're doing it wrong. The more effort you put in at home, the more flexibility you'll get to do the things you want to do. If you busted your *** all week helping out at home, and need 3 hours to yourself Sunday morning, she's going to be perfectly fine with it.
Also, never underestimate the value of range sessions/short game sessions when the kids are sleeping. My kids sleep in till 7am and go to bed around 7:45pm - so in the summer time this leaves me an hour in the morning and almost 2 hours in the evening to run to the course while my wife takes a hot bath or does her nails. It almost becomes a strategy thing lol.
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Posted 11 December 2017 - 02:18 PM
You will likely play less golf than you were accustomed to but you have a much more important task at hand now. As others have said your wife will need a break with the child as an infant and toddler, and after that your presence will be required for a whole host of events that may take many of your evenings and weekends. I believe you will enjoy them and gain great satisfaction watching your child(ren) mature and grow. Don't sweat the golf - you will find a way to get out enough and despite the rumors the game is not going anywhere.
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