Words are flying in all languages tonight. You know why: the LPGA has sent the word down that it’s going to be English-mostly on tour from now on.

Now, the pressure is on. It’s on the foreign pros to learn English well enough to say "Nice shot, Nancy" and "Keep your head down" to their pro/am partners, who apparently have spent big bucks not only to rub elbows and play with the LPGA players, but to demand witty chit-chat that will open the money coffers and shower the tour with gold, gold I tells ya.

The pressure is also on the amateur players to come up with conversation — easily understandable and vibrant conversation: "Do you…have Big Macs…in your country?" Instead, they have to think: "What on earth am I paying for here–awkward, embarrassing, forced conversation? I thought they ordered these women to speak English for us! If this event is so important, where are the translators? Cheap old LPGA…."

Will speaking halting English be enough to realize their money goals?  Is Shakespearean English next?  Or, perhaps favorite songs sung by your LPGA pro? Can a pro exchange English lessons for a skill that might realize even more money, like juggling?

I get it, I get it. I do. But usually persuasive and patronizing marketing tactics aren’t flailed about in such a blatantly crass and unfeeling manner. Usually, this type of tactic is employed beneath the radar with Thought Leaders wielding people-strategies. The LPGA is not only embarrassing the players, but the public is embarrassed for and sympathizes with these talented women.

Some people see the sense in this new rule, and the people I’ve heard defend it seem ticked-off at having to defend it. But how will the success of this Words-for-Dollars campaign be measured? Answer me that in any language?  Why do so many companies try to force change on people, instead of changing their system or their vision?

This isn’t about how valuable it is to learn English. Clearly, on the LPGA, it is far more important to learn golf. This is about finding a way to attach puppet strings to the players who don’t have their own ball color or their own TV show, but whose numbers increase yearly.

At a time when the golf on the LPGA has rarely been better, more exciting, and more entertaining, a dark cloud has swept over the women’s tour today. It feels like the 1950s around here.

On the other hand, maybe this opens the door to other changes down the road. Hmmm. I, for one, would like to see more redheads on the LPGA.
 

note:  won=Korean currency